Cosmic Glue

My dear hidden beloved,

A beautiful still bright day and I am with you in my mind every minute of it. Don’t you love that I am not boring? Don’t you love that I drive you mad? What would life be without this flame between us that enriches our existence? Will you choose to melt into me just one more time? Let’s be wild and exciting and confusing to all that pretend to know a thing or two about us. All the beauty of the world is passing like a dream behind their eyes. I want to inhale all the dreams and exhale all the beauty. To give without end to the sprawl of now. I don’t care to be understood. My soul desires to spill out freely. With no reservation. I wait for the day that you will come along with me on an even more spectacular adventure than the ones before. The two of us living a life without an apology to others. My love for you could create two moons. It is true. But my sadness without you could blow out the flames of the sun as if it were only just a candle. I want to create worlds upon worlds with you and feel you cum in me endlessly. I once read that the sensation of pleasure is evidence of ones personal truth. Only with you does that feel truer than true. Don’t stop exploring my ever-shifting self. It loves you dearly. Your love helps me move through the waking world with such delight. Only in your arms do I feel a cosmic glue. I will be patient but don’t you feel the universe waiting too?

Yours forever,

Nova

A.N.

Time Is Not A Line

Chapter One

M E T A N O I A

B R E A K A P A R T

Below is a still from the first chapter of Metanoia. It’s the shoot that started it all. After leaving my husband of 5 years I suddenly felt as if I was faraway from earth. I landed within my own little world and everything was upside down. Colors were just a memory and I had to revisit myself. I began to roam around old and new emotional landscapes. As Metanoia moves through circular time you will see that my world begins to expand and transform. I am looking forward to your arrival. 

First Letter

Dear Andrei,

I hate waking up in the middle of the night. I would prefer to be on nodding off terms with reality. I have not yet come to terms that this separation is final. I guess each one has their way of remembering. The way in which we all project onto others is bound to be fatal because it is a fantasy. Our minds in time will reveal bitter disappointments. I am still fearful of my own explosive nature. Which is a part of the reason I have chosen to live and breathe in a faraway place. I feel free within my simple days of watching diamond shape lights dart across the floor. I love myself enough to do absolutely nothing but relax and pay attention to hidden delights. I have learned how to see clearly in the dark. I have learned that when I am not missing you I tend to miss missing you. When you meet someone new are you reminded of my absence? I have dreams of you but your face is blurred and all else is in focus. I wake up with dry eyes and frustration. I am still hurt by memories of you. This constant state of happening is exhausting yet warm. Maybe the warmth is only felt deeply because of its familiarity. Time is slowly dying as my longing for you grows. The time has not yet come but it is near. You have no idea who I am now and I’d like to keep it that way. Myself is untouched and so therefore the closest it has been to being true. What am I wearing in your mind? What are we doing?

Nova